From Paris __with love
Antony Kastrinakis is The Sun’s WORLD FOOTBALL CORRESPONDENT, so you might think that he would know a smidgen or two about world football. You might think – in particular – that he would know the difference between Arsenal and PSG. You would think, for example, that he would know that Arsenal have the fourth-biggest wage bill in the Premier League and that PSG have a wage bill 2.5 times that of their nearest French competitor. That makes their domestic situation rather different.
But whatever knowledge The Sun’s WORLD FOOTBALL CORRESPONDENT has of world football is far outweighed by his contempt for Arsene Wenger.
‘Gunners boss Wenger would not last more than a year without winning Ligue Un with Paris Saint-Germain. Let alone a decade or, heaven forbid 12 years and counting, as he has done at Arsenal without winning the title.’
‘Ironic, given Wenger’s cosy relationship __with the Qatari owners of PSG who would love to recruit him.’
That, Antony, is about as ironic as rain on your wedding day. It’s not ‘ironic’ that PSG – a club whose budget makes Ligue Un a formality – would like to recruit a manager who has won three domestic titles despite never having the biggest budget; it’s entirely understandable. It’s also worth pointing out that Wenger has at least reached a Champions League final.
Kastrinakis is not done there…
‘PSG boss Unai Emery has won as many medals in the last three years as Wenger has in his last 11. But while Wenger’s last three were all FA Cups, Emery’s were all Europa League wins with Sevilla. Successive wins at a club with a fraction of Arsenal’s budget.’
We agree with Kastrinakis on this point at least: It’s utterly embarrassing that Arsene Wenger has failed to win a competition which they have not actually played in. And why have they not played in it? Because Arsenal have consistently finished in the top four and consistently qualified from their Champions League group. Under their bloody useless manager.
Every loser wins
‘Losing is not in Mourinho’s nature,’ writes Neil Custis in The Sun.
Tell that to Chelsea fans who sat through nine defeats in the first 16 games of last season, Neil.
Every loser stays
Do you remember when Neil Custis claimed that ‘Jose Mourinho has turned Manchester United around to become the force of old in just three months’ and told us all the ways he had ‘lifted the clouds’ at Old Trafford? It’s here in all its glory.
Here’s one of those ways he was ‘already on his way to consigning the last three years of misery at Manchester United to the dustbin of history’:
‘From the moment he arrived, the message has been positive, about winning the title. Nothing on philosophies or things taking time.’
That was on September 6 but what say you now, Neil, when this was Jose’s message on November 23:
“The best manager in PL history needed a few years to build a successful period, if the best needed time then others do too. The three-year contract I was given is a fair period of time. My three years isn’t just about transfer windows, it is about building relationships with the players.”
It sounds an awful lot like he’s saying that things might take time.
Custis’ take on these latest quotes:
‘THIS TIME Jose Mourinho wants to be at a club for keeps.’
You spin me right round baby, right round, like a record baby, right round, round, round.
French lessons
But do you know what will be really bothering Wenger this fine Thursday? That ‘ARSENAL still have some work to do if they are to protect their record against the French. They have never finished below a club from France in the group stages.’
That’s one of the things the Daily Mail ‘learned’ from the Emirates. And aren’t we all glad they did?
S.E.O
The gold at the end of the football internet rainbow is a headline containing the words ‘Liverpool’, ‘Manchester United’ and ‘Arsenal’.
So here’s the Daily Mirror website reporting the news that every single Premier League club as well as Premiership Rugby, Football Association, English Football League, Rugby Football Union and sports clubs around Britain are taking part in the Rainbow Laces takeover to support the LGBT community this weekend:
‘Liverpool, Manchester United and Arsenal lead Premier League support for Rainbow Laces 2016 campaign.’
Wow. Sometimes you just have to stand and applaud.
The ‘football’ headlines we deserve
‘Olivier Giroud enjoys a meal at Sexy Fish restaurant to celebrate Arsenal goalscoring run’ – Daily Mirror.
‘Cristiano Ronaldo DISGUISES himself for secret Disneyland trip with rumoured girlfriend Georgina Rodriguez’ – Daily Mirror.
Sigh.
It’s got to beeeeeeeeeeeee…
Massive football news on MailOnline:
‘Most of us struggle to wake up for work, hitting snooze on the alarm clock multiple times before crawling out of bed.
‘However the ever-perfect Cristiano Ronaldo has shown he is more than happy to hit the ground running in the morning.’
Or more than happy to take lots of money from Poker Stars for an advert?
Ever-perfect and ever-absolutely-stinking-rich.
Open your eyes @DwyaneWade – this is how I wake up 🙈 #raiseithttps://t.co/i6J4wmrc1W pic.twitter.com/QIAujMQnW6
— Cristiano Ronaldo (@Cristiano) November 24, 2016
Sourcey
‘Steven Gerrard is ready to continue his playing career when his contract with the LA Galaxy expires next month, sources close to the player have told ESPN FC‘ – November 7.
How close is ‘close’?
Scoop of the day
If we had not been blocked by Dave Kidd, we would offer our massive congratulations for his ‘THREE LIONS EXCLUSIVE’ on the back page of The Sun. Stand aside Woodward; take cover Bernstein; Kidd has uncovered that the only man in the running for the England job will…wait for it…get the England job.
Altogether now: If the exact opposite would be a better story, it’s probably not worthy of the big sell.
Non-sequitur of the day
This is the opening line of Neil Ashton’s match report from Borussia Monchengladbach v Manchester City, presented (almost) without comment.
‘HISTORY is one thing. The here and now is another.’
Mediawatch would like to add: DOGS are one thing. Cats are another.
Jailhouse rock
Headline in The Sun: ‘Behind Barca.’
Sub-headline in The Sun: ‘NEYMAR’S STARING AT PRISON STRETCH.’
Opening paragraph in The Sun: ‘NEYMAR could be facing JAIL over allegations of corruption.’
Fourteenth paragraph in The Sun: ‘Under the Spanish system, prison terms of under two years can be served as probation.’
Oh.
Paedo rankings
The scandal that could be worse than Jimmy Savile: How football's been shaken to its core by tales of sexual abuse https://t.co/wF6FnJp4JN
— MailOnline Sport (@MailSport) November 23, 2016
For f***’s sake. Do we really need a paedophile ranking system? Can we not just agree that any and all child sex abuse is awful and heartbreaking?
Recommended reading of the day
Richard Jolly on Tottenham’s reliance on Kane and Alderweireld
Michael Cox on PSG looking ready for the next step
Andi Thomas on the terrible luck of Jose Mourinho